5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
I need water and some morals
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
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