what if every blade of grass was a penis?
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
I just found a bag of teeth...
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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