I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
