Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
