I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Randomize
