my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
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