fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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