I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Randomize
