so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
It's rum buckets o'clock
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Randomize
