I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
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