Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
