Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
So much rum. So many feels.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
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