Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
