Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
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