I puked a lego.
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
