oh god the rape fog is back!
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
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