"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
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