I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
i am craving dick and cupcakes
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
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