Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
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