Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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