This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.