New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
33 Sex Crazed People That Are Going Balls Deep
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
21 Family Members Confess The Creepiest Things They Know About a Relative
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.