Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
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