I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Randomize
