There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Your penis caused this!
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize