oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
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