She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
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its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
I love you. Go after that dick
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
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