shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
