Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
