i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
There's a naked man in my car right now.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
