Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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