We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
