I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
