I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
