PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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