This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
