To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
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