waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
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