Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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