So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Randomize