Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
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Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
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Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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