I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
Randomize
