Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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