She announced her abortion via fbk
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Randomize
