Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
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