Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
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