I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
