I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
