I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
