haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
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