It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
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