The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
