Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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